so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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