if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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