You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
