so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
