This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
