i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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