i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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