I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
