oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
