i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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