DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
