I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
