He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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