Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college