So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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