**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
This girl is more easily done than said...
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
