..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Can I color on your dick again?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize