awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
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