i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
