She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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