Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
...so i touched it.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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