I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Randomize
