You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize