I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
