There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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