I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Randomize
