hell yes lets make some ravioli
I think my fart just growled at me.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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