guess who came home with a hottie last night
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole