I think im going to throw up on grandma
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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