Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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