It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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