So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
