His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
