Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
