God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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