Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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