we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Randomize
