she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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