I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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