Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
