Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I need to sanitize my soul.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
So I just went to clothing optional bar
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize