Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
