Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
