Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
