Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
