ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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