Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
