I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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