I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I still have a little drunk in my system
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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