OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
