What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
